News headlines and news feeds on social media seem full of ex-spouses who remain friends after working out an amicable split and an uncontested divorce. In reality, such a split is just not possible for everyone. Divorce is intensely personal; break-ups can be so contentious that only a judge can ultimately decide what is fair. If you find yourself in the middle of divorce purgatory, here are a few guidelines that may help set you free.

Let Things Go

Your Austin litigated divorce lawyer probably alerted you to the possibility that a divorce trial would be long and emotionally draining. Let your attorney take the pressure off you and handle the details. Austin divorce lawyers specialize in addressing unreasonable demands from hostile ex-spouses, which means that you no longer have to. While your attorney is dealing with your spouse, you can deal with your feelings by going to counseling. Spiritual practices such as meditation or yoga may offer some relief from constant stressful thoughts. Distraction may help, too: go to a movie with friends or re-read a comforting favorite book. Physical activity can be a lifesaver, literally. Working out strengthens your heart, reduces stress and encourages overall well-being. Activities have extra benefits if they are outside or with a group.

Begin a New Chapter

Divorce will signal the end of one era, but the beginning of another. You are not required to wait until the divorce is final to start something new. Start small — try a new hairstyle or buy an outfit you would never have considered when married. Then make bigger changes like taking classes or starting a hobby. Travel to a place you have never been and take plenty of pictures. When you get back home, display the snapshots in prominent places, a reminder of the new adventures awaiting you in your new life. Psychologists warn against upending too many facets of your life at once, so wait a while before switching careers. However, this is an ideal time to fantasize about your dream job, if only to reinforce the notion that better days are ahead.

Leave With a Smile

Contentious divorces, which often follow adversarial marriages, are nothing to smile about. You are leaving behind dreams you held dear for years, and some days the only thing that seems certain is that your heart is breaking. Cling to the lessons you have learned and the knowledge that you are wiser now. New dreams will come along, and no one will be able to stop you from making them come true.

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